“Rosie’s Poem” By Molly McGrath Colucci
I'm sorry to do this but I have to get it off my chest
When the void in my life turned to an abyss
Story turned into a real-time nightmare
from which i thought i'd never recover
But I'm told i can if i share
although it gets worse before the end,
it also gets better, let me explain
5 years back, quit drinking cuz alternatives
were death, jail, or the streets
Lost my sister a year after that, just one year into sobriety
But after 4 years past, made it 5 years now, thanks to my
husband, loving family and my elusive HP
My sister signified hope to me
I thought we were each other's destiny
I was her only sister and she was mine
was depressed before she left,
Now joy's even harder to find
Keep searching for faith, trying to connect with the divine,
Need it now more than ever just to find the will to survive
But finding some hope in sharing this
I Told rosie i was joyless just before she ceased to exist (or i felt this)
she quoted Sam Cooke that it's been too hard living
but were afraid to die cuz we don't know what's up there beyond the sky
Even still, she said she was ready for the next adventure, did she somehow know.
possibly even have some choice in the matter of what was in store for her
I just told her how sad and hopeless i was
she said oh my sister, i love you, i need to see you
I saw her again but im not sure she saw me
cuz all i know for sure was that although her organs were still functioning
her brain was no longer working, machines were keeping her "alive" As an organ donor. She died a hero, enabling others to survive through this morbid version of sacrifice
How incredible it was that her kidneys, liver and heart saved three lives
She was my hero, teaching me how to be funny, strong. healthy, honest, kind to people and planet, and to constantly moisturize.
Feeling kind of purposeless, still overall rudderless
Thought it might be cuz i was lazy and selfish
But it turns out i was recently diagnosed as clinically depressed
i know im being way too honest
Rosie just show me you still exist!